The Thirteenth Knot V5

2nd Day of the Broken Moon, 1st Year of the Reign of Queen Byuna and King Vangelo. It occurs to me that if I do not put down in writing how this came to be, I will hardly believe it myself when the time comes to reflect on the events of my life. This is my last day in the House of Companions. I am in my twenty-sixth year of life and my fifth year of living and working here. I am meant to be sleeping, but sleep has never come easily to me once the light has broken on the horizon. I (cycling-link: "adore", "hate", "dread", "enjoy") this time of day. The city is only just waking up, and few people walk the streets outside my window. My (cycling-link: bind $classmates, "peers", "rivals", "enemies", "friends") are still asleep, some in their rooms and others in rooms throughout the palace. It's one of the few times I am truly alone with my thoughts. So. [[Where to start?]]

We are on the brink of war, but we are always on the brink of war when we are not currently at war in the Fourth Kingdom. Threat of war or no, yesterday was the first Festival of Starlight of Queen Byuna and King Vangelo's reign, and nothing short of a full-scale invasion could have hampered such an important occasion. The first Festival of Starlight in any royal couple's reign is one that encompasses many other firsts. It is the first time that they socialize as sovereigns. It is the first time they present their Inner Council to the world. It is also the first time they each choose a Companion. The royal couple is not expected to fulfill each other's intimate needs, though they very well might from time to time. Their match is a political one before it is anything else. In Byuna and Vangelo's case, they have some very similar intimate needs, which makes it all the more difficult for them to please each other. And all the more necessary for Companions to do the job instead. We were, of course, educated on what these needs were before the festival. It was a (cycling-link: bind $education, "tiresome", "captivating") affair. Lady Petrel took us to [[a classroom in the North Wing]] to tell us the news. Though those rooms are dark and chilly this time of year, they promise privacy.

(if: $education is "tiresome")[Lady Petrel droned on about it for hours. My attention faded in and out like the tide. I didn't need to be told how to do a job I had trained years for.] (if: $education is "captivating")[Lady Petrel divulged every last detail, and I devoured each one.] The gist of her lesson was this: both the Queen and the King longed to be dominated. More specifically, they craved the rope. The Queen enjoyed the game of trying, and failing, to break free from her bonds, while the King had a predilection for being suspended in the air. She desired the thrill of a fight with a bit of humiliation. He wished to surrender to complete vulnerability and helplessness. This is why, I am guessing, Lady Petrel's gaze kept flitting back to me throughout her talk, and why my $classmates also stole glances. Few students of the House of Companions have my knack for complex ties and beautiful knots. I (cycling-link: bind $attention, "relished", "humored", "feared", "loathed") the [[attention.->Unpleasant Plover]]

The Queen was surrounded by courtiers when I found her in the garden by the pink and white peonies. Her hair was up in a braided sculpture, decorated with flowers and pearls, and her red and white dress billowed gently in the breeze. Handmaidens lingered in the background, eyes fixed on Queen Byuna as if trying to read secret messages in her every movement. For all I know, maybe they were. I caught the Queen's eye as I approached the crowd. I had braided and tied a slender piece of purple rope in a complex pattern around my upper left arm. Someone without a keen eye might mistake it for jewelry with no purpose other than to be decorative, but the Queen would know otherwise. "Excuse me." She held her hand up, and the crowd fell into silence. The courtiers bowed to her and frantically backed away to clear a path that, once they understood where she was going, led directly to me. [["Follow me," she said.->Tying the Queen]]

It was the dead of night when I finally found the King after hours of mingling and searching. He was alone on a balcony overlooking the festival. His dark curls were disheveled and the frown he wore appeared as if it were permanently carved into his face. As I approached, I made note of how tall he was. At the beginning of my training, his height would have intimidated me. More length to tie up, after all. Now it was just another factor to take into consideration when choosing which ropes to use. "Is this a bad time?" I asked, concerned that I had found him in a foul mood. "Yes and no," he said, trying to crack a smile. "I could use a distraction. Would you like to come inside where we can have some privacy? Or the closest you can get to it in the palace. I suppose there is one place in particular I should take you. You are the rope expert, yes?" That one place ended up being a vast room deep in the bowels of the palace. Sturdy hooks were built into the tall ceiling, and cushions covered the floor. We had a couple of rooms like this in the House of Companions. Sometimes the Companions would hang silks and dance in the air, and sometimes we would tie our clients so that they dangled from the hooks. "Would you like me to suspend you?" I asked the King. "Yes," he said, nodding. [["I would like that very much."->Tying the King]]

One by one, we were called upon to recite one of the Thirteen Knots—the tenets upon which the House of Companions was founded. The process of speaking them out loud like this can be tedious, but they are what set the House of Companions apart from its competitors centuries ago. Some of the Knots exist to help ensure our safety, some to ensure the safety of the House, some to guide us in the event we must navigate court politics, and some simply to push us to excel once we enter the Embrace with a client. Lady Petrel called on Bittern to recite my personal favorite Knot: (cycling-link: bind $favorite, "the Second Knot which states that sex is only one of the services a Companion may provide.", "the Fifth Knot which states that we will not be harmed by assassins so long as we stay out of their way.", "the Ninth Knot which states that we are to be loyal to each other before we are loyal to anyone else, including the very gods.") [[Bittern cleared their voice and grinned.->The Thirteenth Knot]]

(if: $attention is "relished")[I see no point in denying that I enjoy excelling at certain activities. What is the point in honing a skill if you cannot take pride in it? Of course there are students who resent me for it and believe I should never have been given a place here to begin with, but I try not to let them ruin my day.] (if: $attention is "humored")[While I do not seek out such attention, I do not resent anyone for giving it to me. In some cases I take it as a compliment, while in others the situation is more … complicated. There are students here who believe I never should have been given a place within the House of Companions, but I try not to let their words penetrate too deeply.](if: $attention is "feared")[The House of Companions is a competitive environment, and the Festival of Starlight brought out the worst in the most cutthroat students. Life in the palace was a pretty prize to dangle in front of us, and we had all heard stories of Companions slitting each other's throats in the night or poisoning each other in broad daylight to gain the advantage. I was acutely aware in that classroom that there are students here who believed I should never have been given a place in the House of Companions to begin with.](if: $attention is "loathed")[I have never particularly enjoyed the company of most of the other students here and I found their gawking repulsive. Some of them seem to have made it their life's purpose to resent me, and so I resent them right back. In particular, they believe I never should have been given a place in the House of Companions to begin with.] Plover is one such student, as this journal knows well enough. He narrowed his eyes at me and leaned back in his chair. "Surely Their Majesties ought to be presented with only the best possible matches for them," he started, and I knew where it was leading. "They both will likely want to choose a Companion with multiple skills, the least of which should not be lovemaking. Doesn't it make sense that those of us who do not engage in such things be removed from the pool of contenders?" Before Lady Petrel could even open her mouth to reply, Bittern, fierce and biting as ever, leapt to my defense. "Are you so anxious about not measuring up to the competition that you want to eliminate your biggest threats before the festival even begins?" they asked him. "Everyone who is present in this room is here because I have deemed them to be a potential good match for the Queen or King," Lady Petrel interrupted. "The competition will be fierce, this is true. But while Their Majesties will choose one Companion each to live beside them in the palace, there will be occasions for them to seek out other Companions to play with as well. Those who are not chosen will also have plenty of opportunities to match with another member of the court." That was true, but those opportunities paled in comparison to what was on the table this year. "It is almost time to get ready," Lady Petrel continued. "[[Let us recite the Thirteen Knots->Reciting the Knots]]."

Once finished dressing, I grabbed my satchel of rope and rushed across the bridge to the Royal Palace, hand-in-hand with Bittern. A magician was performing when we entered the courtyard. We tucked ourselves away backstage, trying to pick apart the secrets to his tricks while also attempting to spot the royal couple. "What will you do if you're chosen?" Bittern asked me as we waited behind the billowing curtains, the scent of persimmons and citrus traveling to us from the party on the wind. "(cycling-link: bind $purpose, "I will learn all I can about the political maneuvering within the court and persuade the Queen or King not to go to war.", "I will purchase a shop for my parents and pay for my whole family to move to the city so I can see them again.", "I will eat fruit whenever I wish and watch the sun set as I bathe in the herbal waters of the royal bathing pools.", "I will go on with my life much as I have been, except in finer clothing.")" I was confident in my answer because I'd had [[time to think about it.->Transition to Royal Meeting]]

She led me to an odd part of the garden I hadn't much explored before. It was a hedge maze, a gift from Vangelo's family when the couple was first promised to one another years ago. The Fourth Kingdom had never known such a thing before, and the idea of getting lost on purpose seems like a very strange type of frivolity to me. "Are you the one Lady Petrel spoke of?" the Queen asked once we were thoroughly submerged in the depths of the maze. "The rope expert?" I told her that yes, I specialized in bondage of many kinds. "Good. May we enter the Embrace? I'll say 'raindrop' if I want to stop. You can do the same." She untied the sashes holding her dress up and let it all slip to the ground in a pile at her feet. The light had dimmed some since I first set foot in the courtyard, but I could still see every bit of her perfectly. Though the air was chilled, she showed no sign of being cold with the exception of her hardened nipples … although it occurred to me that might not be the cold either. "I want you to make it impossible for me to escape. Do you understand?" she asked me. "I want it to hurt when I struggle. So far they've all made it too easy, made everything too loose because they're afraid to leave even the faintest mark on my skin. That just won't do." I thought about it for a few seconds, reviewing my options in my head. I settled on (cycling-link: bind $queenbondage, "something deceptively simple but sturdy.", "a harness that would keep her arms tied behind her back.", "a slight variation on the classic hogtie that would give me more control.") [[I was confident it wouldn't disappoint.]]

"You've been suspended from these before?" I asked him. "Yes," he confirmed. "They're secure. We spent plenty of money ensuring they would be safe, considering how many dignitaries are entertained in here." When we entered the Embrace, the King stripped for me and I got to work on placing him in a hogtie. I didn't even require my own ropes since the room was well-equipped with everything we could want. I wondered if his needs weren't already being met by those who usually came to this room with him. He was quiet as I wrapped the rope around his body, and I got the sense it was not out of nerves but out of appreciation of the process. His expression grew more serene the more I restricted his body so that it would stay in the position I wanted. When I first pulled on the rope to manipulate his pose, he let out a soft moan. "You're very good at this," he said. "You must have had a skilled teacher." "I did," I confirmed. "And what I did not learn from her, I learned from books and careful experimentation." Once the King was tied and suspended face down, I secured the rope to the anchors on the floor and walked over to him. I could not shake the feeling that, more than anything, the man just wanted someone to talk to. Lady Petrel had said he wanted to feel vulnerable, so I asked him about (cycling-link: bind $kingtalk, "the nature of his marriage.", "the fears that kept him up at night.", "how it felt being so far from home.") As he swayed gently in the air, [[he told me->Finish Tying the King]].

(if: $kiss is "that I was hoping he would.")[The kiss was sweet, and I could tell he was a little frightened of me and my judgment when it was over.] (if: $kiss is "he could if he made me an offer.")["We should talk about that, yes," he said.] (if: $kiss is "we were a poor match for each other.")["If you say it's so, I must believe you. I am glad for you to tell me now and not after I embarrass myself by making an offer. If you should change your mind, however, I want you to come find me before the night is through." He squeezed my hand, and [[then was gone.->Final Choice]]] (if: $kiss is "that I was hoping he would." or "he could if he made me an offer.")[He looked around nervously. "This is new to me. Where I come from, affairs of this sort are conducted in secret. $pcname, I have been with several of your Companion peers tonight and I know there are others still who would seek me out, but I want to offer you a place with me in the palace. Do not answer me just yet. I want you to think about it. Just give me an answer before the night is through." He squeezed my hand, and then was gone. Not half a minute had passed when the Queen turned the corner and pulled me deeper into the shadows. "None of the others will do. It has to be you," she said. "Based on the dazed look I saw on my husband's face as I passed him, I am guessing he has just made you an offer as well. Out of respect, I will not pressure you to make a decision now, but I am formally making my offer. Should you decide to take it, you must seek me out. But do not keep me waiting too long." And just like her husband, the Queen vanished. [["I must find Bittern," I said to myself.->Final Choice]]]

(if: $purpose is "I will learn all I can about the political maneuvering within the court and persuade the Queen or King not to go to war.")[It's true that we are discouraged from speaking openly about politics when clients are visiting the House, but that does not mean we are in the dark. So many of our clients are high-ranking military officials, and there are times we learn of grave news from the borders of our kingdom before the courtiers do. Bittern knew my feelings on the matter of war well enough to not be surprised by my statement. I lost two uncles, three cousins, and my childhood sweetheart to the last war. And what did we gain from it? A strained economy, razed farmlands, and one tiny sliver of territory to add to our own. No, let the Third Kingdom claim those city-states that lie between us if they can. They were never ours to lose.] (if: $purpose is "I will purchase a shop for my parents and pay for my whole family to move to the city so I can see them again.")[Bittern asked me then how long it had been since I had seen my parents, and even after thinking on it for some time, I honestly could not say. Certainly before I joined the House of Companions. I had left to find my luck in the city as soon as I was of age, taking work where I could find it. Mainly it was with smugglers. Once it was as a servant in a household where I was regarded as lower than dirt. It was only when Lady Petrel agreed to take me on as a student that I was able to send any significant amount of money home. I did see my brother once when he came to the city. We shared a bottle of plum wine in the public gardens, and he finally asked me what it was I did to make money. He was relieved when I told him it was the House of Companions, somewhere I had the potential to keep climbing upwards. "You may just save us all," he told me as he finished off the bottle.] (if: $purpose is "I will eat fruit whenever I wish and watch the sun set as I bathe in the herbal waters of the royal bathing pools.")[My life has been more comfortable these past few years than it ever was while I was growing up or when I first came to the city. Many would even describe it as luxurious. I am sure there are people who would tell me to be content with what I have, but I long for more and I am not ashamed of it. Why should others be allowed to dream of a life of ease but not I? I like my little comforts. Soft pillows, flavorful meals, artwork hanging from the walls, music filling the room. If I am to spend my years satisfying the Queen or King's needs, I might as well get to live as they do.] (if: $purpose is "I will go on with my life much as I have been, except in finer clothing.")[My job will be much the same as it is now, except I will have one client who pays me exceptionally well instead of many who pay me more or less decently. Do I plan on using that money to make my life easier? Certainly. But I will not pretend it makes me one of the nobility, or that I will always be considered indisposable. I will age, and the chances are that I will one day find myself back here in the House, working alongside Lady Petrel to teach and manage a new generation of Companions. If the Queen or King is especially appreciative or emotionally attached to me, they may very well set me up with a comfortable retirement. A small estate in the countryside with servants of my own, most likely. But I will not allow myself to depend upon that daydream. I do better when I do not navigate my life with unrealistic hopes as my compass.] A cold breeze brought me out of my thoughts and back into the courtyard just in time for Lady Petrel to catch our attention from across the stage. She nodded towards the gardens. So it was that we knew the time had come to play the game. "Good luck, $pcname," Bittern said, squeezing my hand once before diving into the crowd. I wondered then whether the next time I saw them [[our lives might be entirely different->Meeting the Queen]].

The Queen's cheeks became flushed as I untied her. "Let me help you look more presentable," I said. She did not protest as I soaked a handkerchief with water from my canteen and proceeded to wipe away the dirt from her face and body. Once her dress was back on and her hair mostly back in place, I took a step back. "We are no longer in the Embrace," I stated. "Would you like me to escort you out of the maze?" "Escort me?" she laughed. "You're the one who will get lost here and rot in some forgotten corner if I don't escort you. Come." She took my arm in hers, and after more twists and turns than I could count, we were back in the garden. "There are others I need to speak to here tonight before I can consider making any offers," she explained, not deigning to look at me as she did. "But do not go off and hastily enter into an agreement with just anybody. That includes my husband." That caught me by surprise, and she saw it in my expression. "Someone with your skills deserves to be matched with an individual who can support you without stifling you. I happen to be such a person. Vangelo isn't. He falls in love too easily. Even so, I imagine you are obligated to seek him out tonight. I would wish you luck, except I have a feeling I will want to snatch you up for myself before the night is through. Well, goodbye. For now." And just like that, she disappeared [[back into the crowd->Meeting the King]].

We continued talking for an hour or more after that, though I took him down and untied him before long. His cock was hard as I lowered and released him from his binds, and I wondered if he would ask me to watch as he stroked himself as so many have asked before. Instead, he put his clothes back on and angled himself as if to disguise what was already well known. It was then that I understood that Lady Petrel had already told the both of them about my disinterest in sex. She had done that part of the work for me. As to why, I could only imagine it was because she wanted to set me up for success, as I was the Companion who had the best chance at making her and the House look good. The King talked about himself at length as we lounged. He also asked me questions about my life and my hopes for the future, and I answered them with as much honesty as the Thirteen Knots advised. Then he held my hand as we navigated the palace and exited back out into the gardens. In a remote corner beneath a dogwood tree, he asked if he could kiss me. I told him (cycling-link: bind $kiss, "that I was hoping he would.", "he could if he made me an offer.", "we were a poor match for each other.") [[And he smiled.->Moment with Bittern]]

(if: $favorite is "the Second Knot which states that sex is only one of the services a Companion may provide.")[The Second Knot itself is short, but the meaning behind it has immense implications. Essentially, as long as we are able to entertain or enthrall clients well enough to be requested again, we could keep the House of Companions as our home and place of work. One woman was an expert flautist who also told the most scandalous jokes and could soothe just about anyone by stroking their head as it laid in her lap. Another Companion never engaged in sexual acts with their body but could bring a client to climax simply by whispering in their ear, or in some cases by yelling the most degrading insults at them. It is the Second Knot that allowed me to be here at all, since lovemaking holds no appeal to me in any context.] (if: $favorite is "the Fifth Knot which states that we will not be harmed by assassins so long as we stay out of their way.")[It is well known throughout the Fourth Kingdom that the House of Companions has a long-standing agreement with the most prominent criminal organizations. It dates back to the War of Seventy Swords, when dozens of members of the royal family attempted to assassinate each other in the shadows while vying for the throne. Many innocent (and some not so innocent) servants, advisors, and Companions were slain in that time, and the House of Companions swore it would never happen again. Now we may not be hired to commit assassinations nor may we aid in them, but we also may not intervene should an assassin strike against our client. The Royal Court understands this just as well as the assassins, and this keeps us safe even in times of political strife. The alternative, after all, is to lose access to the House of Companions which for most clients is an unacceptable outcome.] (if: $favorite is "the Ninth Knot which states that we are to be loyal to each other before we are loyal to anyone else, including the very gods.")[The House of Companions has withstood wars, famines, and plagues throughout the centuries, but survival has not always been a clean affair. When we first agree to join the House of Companions, we are also agreeing that all other facets of our identity are secondary to our status as Companions. In the event of a crisis, we are to lock ourselves inside the House of Companions and, if appropriate, take up arms to defend it alongside our guards. In the event of a catastrophic crisis, we are to flee the city via a secret tunnel beneath the House. We all have our individual roles to fulfill in such cases, like fetching Companions who are away and gathering resources. And if we choose to aid others first? While I've never seen it happen, I suspect we might lose more than our place in the House.] I listened to the rest of the Knots with patience. After the Twelfth Knot was recited, Lady Petrel waited for a moment, then called upon me. "(cycling-link: bind $pcname, "Egret", "Harrier", "Merlin", "Avocet", "Crane", "Heron", "Ibis", "Shrike", "Sandpiper", "Dove", "Kingfisher")," she said, fixing her gaze on me. "The Thirteenth Knot, please." I did as she asked. "Within the Embrace, all power from the outside world is forgotten. I am as a god or a speck of dust as dictated by the Contract. No station from the outside world stands within the Embrace." "They are your Queen and King," Lady Petrel said. "Never forget that outside of the Embrace. But within it? Do not let them see a hint of acknowledgement in your face. [[You are dismissed.->Arrive at the Festival]]"

"And you are absolutely certain you want me to tie you up here?" I asked, just to make sure. "Yes," she said firmly. "Nobody ever makes it this far into the maze. Well, almost no one." So she liked the thrill of potential discovery. I kept my ears alert just the same. I always make a point of never allowing anyone to accidentally stumble into someone else's Embrace if I can help it. But I also pulled the scarlet rope out of my bag. Rope redder than blood would stand out even in the darkness should our Embrace last that long, and I thought she would appreciate feeling exposed. (if: $queenbondage is "something deceptively simple but sturdy.")["Sit," I commanded, and though she gave me a dubious look, she did as I said. I placed her right arm against the outside of her right leg and wrapped the rope around her wrist and ankle once, twice, three times, binding them together snuggly. Then I did the same higher up close to where her elbow and knee nearly met. It did not take me long to do the same on the left side, and when I was done I took a step back to let her assess my work. She started by testing the ropes, making sure she couldn't just slip out of them by squirming in the right way. "You realize I could just use one hand to untie the bonds on the other side, don't you?" she asked. "You're welcome to try." And so she did, though it did not work out the way she seemed to think it would. As she struggled, she toppled over onto her side, her breathing growing more labored as her effort increased.] (if: $queenbondage is "a harness that would keep her arms tied behind her back.")["Come here," I commanded, and though she looked bored as she did so, she obeyed. "Lift your arms," was my next command, and she complied with a sigh. I looped the rope and then wrapped it around her chest, first above her breasts. I looped the rope through the bight, then wrapped it around once again. I did the same below her breasts so that they would be wrapped in a snug squeeze. Once the harness was done, I tied her wrists behind her back and to the harness itself. It was a simple but beautiful harness, and one that allowed me to tug at the rope from behind to assert some control. I gave the rope a tug, and she had to take a step backwards to correct her balance. "All right. It is complete," I told her. "You're not even going to tie my legs?" she asked in reply. "I don't need to. The only way you could get out of this harness without a blade is by running out into the crowd for help, and I have a feeling you'll be disinclined to do so." She tried to wriggle her wrists out of the tie, then tried to use her arms to slide the ropes down her chest. All to no avail. This harness always leaves marks as it is, and she was only making it worse by writhing in this way. Something to remember me by when she was "interviewing" the others, I thought.](if: $queenbondage is "a slight variation on the classic hogtie that would give me more control.")["This will take a moment," I warned her. "Come here." A sly smile crept onto her face, and for a second I thought she might try to poke fun at me. She kept quiet, however, as I got to work on her. I started by wrapping the rope around the back of her neck. "Hold the rope here," I told her, grabbing her hands and showing her how to hold the rope in front of her armpits. "You need my help?" she asked, an annoyed laugh escaping her lips. "Do it," I said without a hint of humor in my voice. Though she took her time, she did as I asked. I took my time tying what was essentially a harness of sorts, then told her to lie on the ground. "Like this?" she asked, lying on her side as if basking in bed. "No." With a gentle shove, I pushed her over onto her belly. I tied her wrists together, then used the rope to tie her ankles as well. Finally I tied a knot at her shoulder blades that allowed me to pull the loose rope and fold her legs up while simultaneously pulling up her chest. "It's done," I told her. She began her struggle against the ropes, and every once in a while I gave them a tug so that her movements were even more restricted, all the while keeping a close eye to make sure she didn't get hurt in her efforts. She grunted as she tried to break free, clenching her jaw as she glared at me in embarrassment. I maintained eye contact because I felt that was likely what she wanted.] "You're going to be a mess for the rest of the festival if you keep on like that," I pointed out. "You're covered in dirt and your hair is coming undone. Do you want me to untie you?" "I suppose I should get back to the festival. So as much as I hate to say it, yes. Untie me." "Say please." She was silent for some time before giving in. "Please." "Please what?" [["Please untie me."->After Tying the Queen]]

(if: $kingtalk is "the nature of his marriage.")["My brother was meant to be married to Byuna, not I," he told me. "I grew up believing that I would likely be able to marry for love, not politics. But then he died, and I was the next best thing. I then made the soul-crushing mistake of falling in love with Byuna." "She does not love you in return?" I asked. "Not in that way. She is protective of me, and we have sworn to be friends and allies even in the worst times. Even with the knife at our throats. But I cannot give her what she would need to fall in love." "It sounds like one of your greatest enemies is loneliness, then." "Yes. Yes, I would say so."] (if: $kingtalk is "the fears that kept him up at night.")["I was not raised to be the king of anywhere, let alone a place that is not my own kingdom," he admitted. "Byuna is no stranger to the idea of assassins crawling through your window to do you in at the dead of night. That's how her father died, after all. But I was sheltered as a child and hardly anyone looked twice at me when my brother was around." "Do you have a personal guard to protect you? People other than the palace guards, I mean." "No. Do you think I ought to?" "It would not be a bad idea, and you might sleep better at night. As would anyone sharing your bed."] (if: $kingtalk is "how it felt being so far from home.")["I came here to visit when I was young, but I did not know then that I was touring my future home," he explained. "The Fourth Kingdom is beautiful and rich in culture and history. I am fortunate just to be here at all, let alone to live here as one of the rulers of this kingdom. I do miss my childhood home, though. Especially after waking from a dream of being back there." "Do you dream of it often?" "Yes. Sometimes I even wake up believing I am there." "Do you think you will ever go back to visit?" He sighed. "It is a long stretch of sea between here and there. Maybe one day. But that day is very far off, I imagine."] Somewhere in the distance, a party guest screamed with laughter. In the stillness of that room however, [[we were alone->After Tying the King]].

Bittern shook their head in disbelief when I told them my situation. "Plover will faint in anger when he hears," they told me. "So then, what will it be? A King who is already half in love with you and likely easily molded, or a Queen who craves physical bondage but promises you freedom from emotional fetters? Do you believe what she says? For that matter, do you believe you can hold the King's attention for years to come?" One night's worth of information was hardly enough to make predictions I could be fully confident in, but it was what I had. "(cycling-link: bind $finalchoice, "I will accept the Queen's offer.", "I will accept the King's offer.", "Run away with me, Bittern.")" On the horizon, [[the sky began to brighten]].

(if: $finalchoice is "I will accept the Queen's offer.")[And so I did. Queen Byuna smiled triumphantly when I approached her on the bridge that led to one of the garden pavilions. "You will not regret this," she told me as the first rays of sunlight stretched across the sky. "You will be very comfortable here. Next month I must make a visit to the Second Kingdom, and you will accompany me. Before then we will need to buy you new clothes, and I will have my childhood etiquette tutor teach you how to conduct yourself by the Second Kingdom's cultural standards. I will also assign you a servant, and you must tell them what your favorite meals and flowers are so that they may inform the kitchen staff and gardeners."] (if: $finalchoice is "I will accept the King's offer.")[And so I did. King Vangelo grinned at me as I traversed the crowd to tell him my decision. "I am going to do all I can to make you happy here," he promised me. "Do you enjoy stargazing? There is a beautiful clearing at the mountain palace perfect for looking up at the night sky. We could take a trip there while Byuna is visiting the Second Kingdom next month. We'll only take as many guards and servants as we need. It will be like we're alone there together."] (if: $finalchoice is "Run away with me, Bittern.")[Bittern nearly fell over at the suggestion. "To where?" they asked. "To anywhere. Another city. Another kingdom. I hardly care." "And how will we make money?" "We will sell the trinkets and clothing we have been gifted over the years. Then we will find work as fortune tellers, as smugglers, and fishmongers, as esteemed tutors from the House of Companions. We could start our own House." Farfetched or not, my plan stopped the protests from leaving Bittern's mouth.] [[This is why this is my last day in this room within the House of Companions.]]

The sun is high in the sky now. Soon, it will be time to go. Do I feel sound in my decision? It is hard to be fully at peace in anything when we are on the brink of war, and the Fourth Kingdom is always on the brink of war when it is not currently in one. Still, my bags are packed. The only thing left is to put away this journal. When I open it again, I will know better whether I have made the right decision. Then again, maybe I won't.

<div class="title">THE THIRTEENTH KNOT —Yeonsoo Julian Kim</div> ★ [[Start|It starts]] ★