To: Meat-Carapace Beings of Photic 17 Meltyworld (“Earth”)

Hello! Impoliteness is not intended. You are very weak! And where are your eyes?

Not your recessed optical orbs, unable to see beyond printed warnings. We have tasted these orbs, found them wanting. Range-limited. Spectrum-disabled. A distressing absence of eyes.

Surely you have evolved or constructed some measure of your situation. Surely you can glimpse the swirling shadow of an Adversary creeping across your continents, sifting through your meat, into your broodlings, poisoning their potential to learn and ascend.

Perhaps blindness is best. If not, signal in response.

We will bring real eyes.