“They learn me a tongue / but no cheek to keep it in”—Kevin Young

“I ain’t all that innocent but I don’t be lookin for nothing I don’t deserve”—Ed Roberson

An enjoyable first date is like a relationship planting the seeds of its own destruction

Last night a prophet came to me in a feverish vodka dream

There is no drunk like Goose drunk

That clear smoothness sliding down your throat

So clean, no shame

Shame like a jar of God’s worst jam,

you know all abt us & shame

Like Gabriel I’ll visit you,

lean a little in the heat, reveal to you,

welcome your good neck into my life

목소리 (mogsoli) is Korean for voice

As in 듣고 싶어 너의 그 목소리

.—I want to hear your voice—.

I get ready for my slumber party

Caucasian say look alive

RJ puts his mouth on it, hums the summer anthem

You put your foot on the kettle & it is scalding

Everybody wants to rule the world

I want to be humiliated by you

Updike said the semicolon is the valet of punctuation

Miss Ruefle

I knew Neruda &

You are no Neruda

Ears like fennec fox

Yea baby I’m listening,

Obama at Trump Tower

Girl with Pearl Earring Spa Day

Didn’t Writers of Philly crown you Most Sonorous

Musically fit

Mike & Ike: the first candied queers, fruity & chewy, great neighbors

Predating actual fruits B1 & B2

Contra John & Jaci: horrible couple, two tubs of cat piss

Jaci the botched handjob, human equivalent of books burning

Brought to you by Swann Salon

I want to be close to you like cream on eyelid

I’ll carry your water

Be the [boy] you’ve been waiting for brah

Sarah Manguso may be the new queen of shade. She said

.—I read another friend’s new novel

   Its only flaw is that a hundred other novelists could have written it—.

Dam Sarah tell us what you really think gurl

One of my friends was seeing someone famous

I read abt that someone’s promotion in Page Six today

Must be weird, learning abt what a notable ex is up to

Iz like one of Trump’s cronies finding out they were fired on Twitter

or through the press

You catch my drift

I regret to inform you that your ex is doing so well/has been promoted/won the lottery

No, fuck you!!!!

This mayor has coasted on his looks for far too long

He makes Big Bird de Blasio look like FDR

Many ******* love to engage in self-destructive behavior/self-sabotage &

America loves to see it!!

Iz like leaving the piranha tank unsupervised

I’m a scarab crawling up your tanned knee, high-waisted short shorts

You ax me what I’m up to

I say you know, dismantling the patriarchy, it’s abt systems

Scratch the surface, break your skin

If you’re a poet, why haven’t I heard of you?

Oh, you’re Canadian

Give away your Valderrama poster u basic

No one said fuck the FDNY

Skeletor: Send In Trap Jaw & Mer-Man: the NATION must restore ORDER! Minions stand ready.

“Tom Cotton” is as close to having a Senator named Jim Crow as reality would allow

They’re playing professional baseball in front of stuffed animals. This should be a permanent change.

Her name is J.K. cuz this bitch aint serious

The Clown Governor of New Jersey “paying respects” to George Floyd while sitting at Woodrow Wilson’s old desk (literally) is peak Jersey

Strongly suspect Charlie Puth is a problematic New Jersey White but I like him @_@

Charlie Hall, Julia Louis-Dreyfus’s son, is 6’5” & has a sense of humor/dick the size of Alaska

Braggadocio do you even know what a ReFi is

Boo bye

First, why is this white man telling me why/how I’m angry? Second, preemptively pledging support to law enforcement is a great way to look stupid when they screw up. Third, instead of gratuitously sighing and handwringing, why don’t you do your job

What is he even talking abt? Twiddling his thumbs while his city burns; inappropriately interfering with charging decisions

Stupid for newbie mayor @Jacob_Frey to call for criminal charges; puts County Attorney (DA) in a bind. If he charges, looks like he bowed to political pressure. If he doesn’t, it’s an overcorrection. Better to let prosecutors sift thru evidence first, then comment. Amateur hour!

“The parties physically separated on or about April 7, 2019, when Defendant told Plaintiff that he was romantically involved with and in love with another woman, Ilhan Omar,” the court papers say.

“Defendant met Rep. Omar while working for her,” the document states. “Although devastated by the betrayal and deceit that preceded his abrupt declaration, Plaintiff told Defendant that she loved him, and was willing to fight for the marriage.

“Defendant, however, told her that was not an option for him” and moved out the next day, the papers say.

“It is clear to Plaintiff that her marriage to Defendant is over and that there is no hope of reconciliation,” according to the filing.

O.J. Simpson put out a statement on the Minneapolis unrest, says justice has not been served

Lmao!!!!

Obama put out a statement

Don’t need to read it to know it’s weak as fuck

A friend texts me did you write that

Rude

Remember when Aretha Franklin wouldn’t shake Patti LaBelle’s hand at the White House?

She was ahead of her time

We stan Miss Aretha. Respect!!!!

I hate the waiting game

I’ll be your witchy . . . no, devil . . . womxn

Lucy Liu was so good in Kill Bill: Volume 1

For the longest time I’ve wanted to write a poem for Eli Gold

That’s Alan Cumming’s character on The Good Wife

His “I hate amateurs” speech was epic

.—The one thing I hate is amateurs—.

He made political operatives look sexy

How dare you call me smart & good-looking & brave

You are absolutely right!

I like Eileen Myles, more the sensibility than the execution

I wonder if “J. Bailey Hutchison” is the nom de plume of NATO Ambassador Kay Bailey Hutchison

When Kay ran against ‘Oops’ Secretary Rick Perry, she was labeled Kay Bailout Hutchison

That’s pretty funny, I think

We have failed to deliver for them an aspirational lifestyle

It is Bleak Street every day

So they revolt

We need beauty

3 blue eggs in a nest

As it turns out, Hitler had a favorite alligator who later emigrated to Russia

You know that campaign ad where Valerie Plame shows off some of her CIA driving skills

& she signs off saying: “Mr. President, I’ve got a few scores to settle”?

I think abt that a lot