Size / / /

I read your "Howl" and cried and roared and howled back.
I read your "Howl" from a beat-up Anthology of American Literature.
I read your "Howl" simply because I had never read you before.
There you were, just sitting on the page.
It was late at night, couldn't sleep,
What other excuse did I need.
What the hell, I thought, I'll read this
Ginsberg guy, see just what he's all about.
After the opening lines I grokked you in
Seeing the best minds of my generation
Destroyed by madness starving hysterical naked.
After the first part my mouth fell agape,
While my newly opening head Moloched with yours,
And then I was with you both in the rocked-up walls of Rockland.
Tears -- real, honest-to-God-tears -- welled in my eyes,
Broke from their dam,
Dropped onto the already full pages.
Read you as though in a fever I did, and stood
Dumbfounded and muted on your final punctuation point.

Finally finding my voice
I read you out loud to myself
Just to hear your words
Echo in real air and space-time.
I read you to the dust on the TV set.
I read you to the futon.
I read you to the wrinkles in the blanket covering the futon.
I read you to the plain-cheapo, because it's only a rental,
brown-apartment-carpet
And the newly Dover White painted walls that hold dark smudges
From where I smashed spiders to their deaths.
And I read you to those smudges,
Now regretting my own
Intolerance, ignorance, blindness.
I read you, yelled you, shouted you,
Balled you, wailed you, bellowed you, screamed you
Ejaculated you out loud
In my own ecstatic insatiate moment of total
Decadence and rapture and fulfillment of
Every last one of my raw, bleeding, throbbing,
Filled-up now with fucking life nerves,
Until my voice and throat cracked open wide
And out flew my pounding, bounding, lusting
Ginsberg filled heart.

Then I did it again.
I howled you to the world.
Crazed in your words
Drunk in your nouns and verbs.
I howled your words forth in a werewolf's cry
To the moon and the blood
And the eternal struggle for the human soul
-- Oh God! let there be one for us to struggle for --
In space too tiny to hold them
My mind too tiny to hold them
No way could I hold them
All in.
They stomped and tore and wracked me
Ripping all the pathos, bathos, cathos right out of
All that I was, am, and will be.
They burst out of my mouth,
They burst out of my throat, lungs, belly, and soul.
They burst out holy,
Ready to fight injustice in the world,
Ready to kick some serious ass,
Ready to knock down the bullshit.
Making me deliverer of your words in a blistering moment of
Dazzle and chaos orchestrated cacophony.
Spouter of your truths, our truths, human truths
-- so small that moment was the cosmos could blink its eye
And entire eternities would pass me by --
Yet there I was ink transfixed, transformed
Into images only a mind reading God could unfold.
One with your words.
All sound and fury,
Blood and muscle,
Human heart and human soul,
Dead poet's voice and dead poet's spirit.
Lightning through tear-blurred pages.
I spoke and stood your words made flesh.

 

Copyright © 2002 Philip Wright

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Currently Philip Wright teaches writing at a community college. Turn-on's (not necessarily in this order) include sushi, lean prose, deep dish poetry, pizza with extra cheese, coffee, classic rock, and dark haired women. Turn-off's include spam email and the "not un" combination in English.



Bio to come.
Current Issue
31 Mar 2025

We are delighted to present to you our second special issue of the year. This one is devoted to ageing and SFF, a theme that is ever-present (including in its absence) in the genre.
Gladys was approaching her first heat when she shed her fur and lost her tail. The transformation was unintentional, and unwanted. When she awoke in her new form, smelling of skin and sweat, she wailed for her pack in a voice that scraped her throat raw.
does the comb understand the vocabulary of hair. Or the not-so-close-pixels of desires even unjoined shape up to become a boat
The birds have flown long ago. But the body, the body is like this: it has swallowed the smaller moon and now it wants to keep it.
now, be-barked / I am finally enough
how you gazed on our red land beside me / then how you traveled it, your eyes gone silver
Here, I examine the roles of the crones of the Expanse space in Persepolis Rising, Tiamat’s Wrath, and Leviathan Falls as leaders and combatants in a fight for freedom that is always to some extent mediated by their reduced physical and mental capacity as older people. I consider how the Expanse foregrounds the value of their long lives and experience as they configure the resistance for their own and future generations’ freedom, as well as their mentorship of younger generations whose inexperience often puts the whole mission in danger.
In the second audio episode of Writing While Disabled, hosts Kristy Anne Cox and Kate Johnston welcome Farah Mendlesohn, acclaimed SFF scholar and conrunner, to talk all things hearing, dyslexia, and more ADHD adjustments, as well as what fandom could and should be doing better for accessibility at conventions, for both volunteers and attendees.
Issue 24 Mar 2025
Issue 17 Mar 2025
Issue 10 Mar 2025
By: Holli Mintzer
Podcast read by: Emmie Christie
Issue 3 Mar 2025
Issue 24 Feb 2025
Issue 17 Feb 2025
Issue 10 Feb 2025
By: Alexandra Munck
Podcast read by: Claire McNerney
Issue 27 Jan 2025
By: River
Issue 20 Jan 2025
Strange Horizons
By: Michelle Kulwicki
Podcast read by: Emmie Christie
Issue 13 Jan 2025
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