Size / / /

Outside of the occasional sun-

jumper, you

seldom run into anything truly

splatterable

except in the most distant reaches

of space.

Radioactive natterjacks, leap-

frogging

from black hole to black hole;

anti-matter

bactroids; clouds of migrating

AI

heading toward the galactic

core to join

their fellow manumits; or even,

heaven forfend,

quantum medusae (a ramscoop of

these and you

can pretty much kiss your present

timeline goodbye).

Regardless, however, of constitutional

makeup, impact

with just about anything at light

speed will

pit, corrode, or otherwise gunk

up your

vehicle big time, so be sure

to keep

your scrapeware activated

no matter

how much your ship protests

(older models

will still use the raincoat in

the shower analogy)

and under no circumstances

attempt to

turn a chance encounter with

anything quasi-

forkable into an impromptu

spaceside BBQ.


Robert Borski lives in Stevens Point, Wisconsin. He is still working on perfecting his recipe for Roadkill Stew. You can see more of Robert's work in our archives.



Robert Borski works for a consortium of elves repairing shoes in Stevens Point, Wisconsin. You can read more of his work in our archives.
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